by Guillermo Vidal | Mar 22, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Pablo Merchán Montes on Unsplash

In his book, An Audience of One: Reclaiming Creativity for Its Own Sake, Srinivas Rao states, “Work for an audience of one. When the only person you are trying to please is yourself, judgements vanish, and in that process, we become more present.”

Damn it! I wish someone had taught me that lesson sooner. …

by Guillermo Vidal | Mar 14, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Geronimo Giqueaux on Unspl

I have been pondering this question ever since an old memory of my father came up during my meditation time. This memory pertained to a time when my father was giving me a warning about keeping my guard up to protect myself from other people. His words of caution went like this;

“Never reveal who you are to others, for they will use that information against you.”

My father did a good job transferring his paranoia to me, and I adhered to this advice for decades. …

by Guillermo Vidal | Mar 7, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Trym Nilsen on Unsplash

I could have titled this piece “How to forgive your abusers”, but I think surviving a troubled childhood is about a lot more than forgiving those who made you suffer. It is about understanding how a troubled childhood has affected your life and kept you from becoming the best you were meant to be.

What makes up a troubled childhood?

Some traumatic experiences are obvious, like sexual abuse, other things not so much. What may seem abusive to some, others call good parenting. The only thing that matters when making this determination is what…

by Guillermo Vidal | Feb 28, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Michael Dziedzic on Unsplash

Setting and enforcing boundaries is necessary if you want to maintain healthy relationships. Many of us, however, were trained to do exactly the opposite. Our parents, teachers and mentors convinced us that it was selfish to take care of our needs before the needs of others. They also taught us to adhere to rules of our family adults and those of people in authority.

The unintended consequences of such teachings were that they caused us to seek the approval of others to establish our worth. Doing so made…

by Guillermo Vidal | Feb 21, 2021 | Aging Well, Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

We often see an addiction as an illness related to substance dependency, but it is much more than that. A behavior can also be addictive, like a sexual addiction or being a workaholic. In simple terms, an addiction is a coping mechanism your ego helped establish so you could feel better or to help you handle stress or suffering.

I am a recovering people pleasing addict

People pleasing is an addiction.

Just like alcoholics irrationally make alcohol the most important thing in their lives, a people pleaser lives his/her life depending on what…

by Guillermo Vidal | Feb 15, 2021 | Aging Well

Photo by Howard Chai on Unsplash

Two of my greatest childhood idols, John Havlicek and Bart Starr, have passed away. I mourn their losses and thank them for the thrills they brought into my life. Who can ever forget Bart Starr leading his Green Bay Packers to victory against the Dallas Cowboys in the “Ice Bowl”, one of the greatest football games of all times?

John Havlicek won eight NBA championships during his sixteen-year career with the Boston Celtics. I admired him so much that I tried to mirror the way I played basketball after his…

by Guillermo Vidal | Feb 8, 2021 | Aging Well

Photo by Sébastien Jermer on Unsplashlife

While walking on the boardwalk that connects my townhome with nine others, I stopped to watch a spider busily building a magnificent web. Without warning, the wind picked up and started blowing the web back and forth like a trampoline. A few minutes later, a gust blew the web into oblivion and I was sure the spider had flown with it. The next day, I saw the same spider reconstructing a new masterpiece.

The whole incident reminded me of the nursery rhyme I used to sing to my kids when…

by Guillermo Vidal | Feb 1, 2021 | Aging Well

Photo by Shifaz Abdul Hakkim on Un

Life is full of important lessons. I remember how proud I was when I learned to drive a car, balance a checkbook, change my babies’ diapers. But these pale in comparison to the importance that the following six lessons have meant to my life.

The “Big Six” (listed in no priority order)

1) We are all connected to a greater consciousness at work in the universe.

I get a little nervous mentioning God/Spirit/Higher Power because I have spent most of my life as a non-believer, yet I cannot emphasize enough how important it was to learn this lesson.

We can see the proof in the most basic human function, thinking. Have you…

by Guillermo Vidal | Jan 25, 2021 | Aging Well

Photo by Joshua Earle on Unsplash

If you are like me and been around the block a few times, then you have experienced some form of spiritual restlessness. I remember how scared I became the first time I experienced the kind of anxiety that comes from this unexpected internal upheaval. My first experience came when, after years of tailoring my life to the expectations of others, the emptiness I sensed inside slowly overtook my entire conscious awareness.

I resisted at first, for my ego is quite stubborn. This resistance caused a big problem because I wanted…

by Guillermo Vidal | Jan 18, 2021 | Aging Well

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

People use the phrase “you are perfect just as you are” to express appreciation for others. While it is kind to show others how much you care for them, it is wrong to think anyone is perfect. Perfection is an illusion, it has no definition, it is not an image fixed in time. The fact is we are always growing. Telling someone they are perfect just as they are detracts from the self-reflection they need to continue seeking their most authentic self.

Some believe there is some plateau people reach…

Guillermo Vidal

Author/Speaker/Mentor/Mayor/Immigrant/Engineer/Spiritual Seeker/Teacher. Willing to share my life experiences and lessons. Follow me on

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