by Guillermo Vidal | May 3, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Crystal Jo on Unsplash

What is your favorite brand to put on people? Epithets like redneck, communist, socialist, asshole, lowlife, uneducated, high-maintenance and loudmouthed are common ones. There are others that don’t seem so offensive but put boundaries around the targeted person’s character; blue collar, conservative, liberal, progressive or overly religious. When we label others, we unfairly restrict them to this description.

It seems like it is second nature for humans to use labels to describe others. This is what our ego uses to identify those who are for or against us…


by Guillermo Vidal | Apr 25, 2021 | Spiritual Development

Photo by Talles Alves on Unsplash

Hard to pinpoint where it all began, but somewhere in human history people began comparing themselves to one another. Later on, society began assigning hierarchical values to these comparisons. They invented terms, like “upper or ruling class, working class and lower class” to designate a person’s importance in society.

As societies grew, they used these comparisons within their structure to define who would rule, where people would live, and who would be sacrificed to the gods.

Different customs divided cultures, and tribes emerged separate from one other. Differences in beliefs…


by Guillermo Vidal | Apr 18, 2021 | Finding Love After Divorce

Photo by Steven Skerritt on Unsplash

During a visit I made to Spain, there was a sign in the corner of a small tapas restaurant in Madrid that caught my eye. It contained this quote from Mexican painter Frida Kahlo,

“Take a lover who looks at you and sees magic.”

I have to admit it but Kahlo’s wisdom was foreign to me. I had never taken a lover who looked at me in such a fashion. …


by Guillermo Vidal | Apr 11, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Marcos Paulo Prado on Unsplash

Even if you accept that every person is just one of countless microcosms in the Universe, nature shows you daily that even the smallest organism has purpose. Let’s take the human body as an example. Scientist have proven that your body replaces every cell roughly every seven years.

I am sure you don’t stay up at night deciding which cells go where, but that is exactly what your body is doing. …


by Guillermo Vidal | Mar 22, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Pablo Merchán Montes on Unsplash

In his book, An Audience of One: Reclaiming Creativity for Its Own Sake, Srinivas Rao states, “Work for an audience of one. When the only person you are trying to please is yourself, judgements vanish, and in that process, we become more present.”

Damn it! I wish someone had taught me that lesson sooner. …


by Guillermo Vidal | Mar 14, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Geronimo Giqueaux on Unspl

I have been pondering this question ever since an old memory of my father came up during my meditation time. This memory pertained to a time when my father was giving me a warning about keeping my guard up to protect myself from other people. His words of caution went like this;

“Never reveal who you are to others, for they will use that information against you.”

My father did a good job transferring his paranoia to me, and I adhered to this advice for decades. …


by Guillermo Vidal | Mar 7, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Trym Nilsen on Unsplash

I could have titled this piece “How to forgive your abusers”, but I think surviving a troubled childhood is about a lot more than forgiving those who made you suffer. It is about understanding how a troubled childhood has affected your life and kept you from becoming the best you were meant to be.

What makes up a troubled childhood?

Some traumatic experiences are obvious, like sexual abuse, other things not so much. What may seem abusive to some, others call good parenting. The only thing that matters when making this determination is what…


by Guillermo Vidal | Feb 28, 2021 | Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Michael Dziedzic on Unsplash

Setting and enforcing boundaries is necessary if you want to maintain healthy relationships. Many of us, however, were trained to do exactly the opposite. Our parents, teachers and mentors convinced us that it was selfish to take care of our needs before the needs of others. They also taught us to adhere to rules of our family adults and those of people in authority.

The unintended consequences of such teachings were that they caused us to seek the approval of others to establish our worth. Doing so made…


by Guillermo Vidal | Feb 21, 2021 | Aging Well, Becoming Your Best Self

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

We often see an addiction as an illness related to substance dependency, but it is much more than that. A behavior can also be addictive, like a sexual addiction or being a workaholic. In simple terms, an addiction is a coping mechanism your ego helped establish so you could feel better or to help you handle stress or suffering.

I am a recovering people pleasing addict

People pleasing is an addiction.

Just like alcoholics irrationally make alcohol the most important thing in their lives, a people pleaser lives his/her life depending on what…


by Guillermo Vidal | Feb 15, 2021 | Aging Well

Photo by Howard Chai on Unsplash

Two of my greatest childhood idols, John Havlicek and Bart Starr, have passed away. I mourn their losses and thank them for the thrills they brought into my life. Who can ever forget Bart Starr leading his Green Bay Packers to victory against the Dallas Cowboys in the “Ice Bowl”, one of the greatest football games of all times?

John Havlicek won eight NBA championships during his sixteen-year career with the Boston Celtics. I admired him so much that I tried to mirror the way I played basketball after his…

Guillermo Vidal

Author/Speaker/Mentor/Mayor/Immigrant/Engineer/Spiritual Seeker/Teacher. Willing to share my life experiences and lessons. Follow me on www.guillermovidal.me.

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